La-Z-Boy Moonlight Madness Sale (Yellow)
Physical Description: The front design occupies the usual centered position. "LA-Z-BOY" is done up in their thick, but elegantly gothic font. "Furniture Galleries" and then a registered trademark sign are done in the same font, but with certain changes. First, the font point size is smaller, the letters are not as thick, and the initial letters (F and in particular on this shirt the G) are larger than the furniture galleries. All of this brand name business precedes a box of black which then has most of the idea content formed by the lack of screening. Four-pointed and dot stars begin the design. In total there are seven four-pointers and nineteen dot stars distributed throughout the front design. A crescent moon with a nose, eye, eyebrow and mouth that is facing right and which seems to be reflecting a sun off shirt on face side looks on to is placed to the left, but underneath an "M". The parts where there is overlap between the moon and the "M" are colored black; this affects the moon's lips, part of its cheek, and a tiny portion of the chin. The moon has two black dot stars on it; one is placed at a 45 degree angle from what would be the moon's pupil, and the other one is right near the bottom of the downward carrot on the "M". The "M" as spoken of above is the only letter in "MOONLIGHT" that has any black in it. Moonlight's letters are all of a "crazy, weird" triangle-based font. I mean these letters are really crazy and really weird going all over the place within limits. The slight tilt makes room for "MADNESS", which will prove to be the only word inside the box whose letters are formed by the paint. The font is some boring, but affirmative font that is full of straight lines that still have a round feeling to them. The placement of the letters is still crazy and weird, although less crazy then in "MOONLIGHT". The "E" has for the optimist an unexplained extra line on the top, or for the pessimist a line cut out of it near the top of the top horizontal stroke. The unpainted portion of madness is a result of not giving geniuses a palette nor canvas to work on. "MADNESS" has unpainted portions to form a thick outline. There is finally some order established when "SALE" comes into play in some serpentinesque font. The letters all have a thick left portion to them, and all have one star that is really a five-pointer, but has two points thrown in on the left for a cheap 7-pointer. The stars in the vowels all shortly extend past the border setup by the box into territory more accustomed to branding.
The back design again stars with painted starts. At the northwest corner painted there are two four-pointed stars and seven dot stars. The southeast corner again has two four-pointers, but eleven total dot stars. A circle shape replaces the box shape of the front, but fulfills the same purpose. The inside has a return to the absence of paint forming the stars, words, and additionally half-moons. There are five four-pointed stars. The top and the easternmost 4-points have four dot stars while the east-southeast star has three, and the remaining two 4-points have two apiece, for a total of fifteen dot stars. The half-moons are of three and function as bullets for the words. The words are split between two fonts and ideas. The first type of font used is some happy, squiggly font. The other typeface resembles "SALE" on the front, excepting that there is no left bias and those words are underlined. There is an "A" and an "M" that has their leftmost strokes go beyond the line. The words say "later HOURS lower PRICES definite PROOF that we've GONE MAD ".
Free shirts lead to fulfillment. Take, for example, me. I rejoice in having a huge wardrobe of tops that I did not have to pay for, and by consequence have to wash very often.
A more inspired example would be Donor Mac, who has always been a vocal supporter of the Free Shirt Archive and delighted in his mention on the write-up of the Beware of the Evil Eye. When I informed him of the Free Shirt Archive he went on to an early version of it and enjoyed what he saw. He asked if he would get mention if he ever had the chance to donate. I told him that he would be mentioned were he to donate. And so he donated, gleefully, a work shirt he refused to wear.
If only more people would find their inner Mac, I would never have to want for a shirt again.
Perhaps the only definite thing nowadays is that Donor Ian is a long-horned Texan. Certainly, keeping a store open after-hours is not proof of madness; it is possibly a sign of business acumen. Convenience is a strong selling point, and some people simply are unable to get to the store to buy furniture during normal times of operation. Why keeping the store open later, other tasks that normally do not get done can now be completed. Later hours are not that bad of an idea for the consumer. The producer has to worry about extra costs such as electricity and labor, so it is understandable that they would only want to keep the stores open for however long feels appropriate. This makes the situation all the more special when the store does have an after-hour sale. In this case, so special that shirts were printed for the occasion.
All overworked employees of La-Z-Boy were given the orders that they had to wear their choice of either a yellow shirt or a pink shirt to work during the time of the moonlight madness sale. Fortunately for us all, Mac chose yellow.
Since the workforce at the La-Z-Boy is mostly male, I can not help but guess that the owners of this particular furniture gallery are the type of inhuman capitalists who care only about money, with occasional employee humiliation being a side benefit. It may be the prerogative of the owner to determine the proper uniforms, but dignity ought to be preserved as much as possible. Sadly, some owners look at their opportunity to buy labor-time as feeding the troft, and that the workers should be proud that they are given an opportunity to fulfill their addictions. Western color association certainly has not escaped a businessman who is selling furniture, nor the employee who would have to wear the shirt. White t-shirts are the cheapest color to print on. Therefore, it is not conjecture that the owner purposefully chose yellow and pink shirts. To remind the employees that customers will laugh at the guy stuck with the pink shirt.
The very first time I wore this shirt, dinner happened to be served. Dinner was to be spaghetti. I excelled at eating the spaghetti efficiently and cleanly... except for one small tiny drop that got into the non-painted part of the "A" in SALE. Immediately, I threw the shirt into the washer and threw in some other light-colored shirts, but it was not until a few washes later before the stain was completely gone. Very traumatic experience that shook what had previously been a strong belief in clothing detergent.
